Friday, December 23, 2011


This is the time of the year where we are totally involved in finding that perfect gift for our family and friends through the maddening rush of shoppers equally focused of finding that perfect gift. I too was in that crowd but I also realize the real meaning of Christmas and what God did for us all.

I am sure all have heard and read of the story many times over the years of Jesus' birth on a day that changed religious history. Jesus wasn't born to rebel and over throw oppressive rulers to save His people. He came to spread peace, love, and sacrifice Himself for our sins as our saviour.

With this in mind, I reflect in the ramnifications of this historical event over two thousand years ago as a gift of love from God to those who believe in Him. Perhaps this is where the pagan ritual of gift giving began. Irregardless, this is the time of the year we all wish for peace on earth in trying times where it seems there is no peace on earth. However, I don't think there will ever be a peace in that respect.

The real peace does not come from government intervention, wars ending, or human intervention. That peace is short lived untill another incident overshadows that incident. The lasting peace comes from with in one's heart and soul combined with a lasting relationship with God and His guidance. There is also another gift from God that any one can receive by only believing in Jesus as their saviour and accepting Him into their lives.

Merry Christmas to all and Peace.

Sunday, October 2, 2011


Here we are two months into the bacterial infection of the liver. Still there but not as severe as before. The doctors still do not know what cause the infection. I was put on Intravenous injections daily for the last 8 weeks to reduce the abscesses and infection. Don't know what is taking so long to clear up this malady but it is slowly clearing up. Much too slow for my liking.

It is to the point now considering I have been on the IV antibiotics this long, I am beginning to see some adverse side effects. (intermittent loss of balance, blood blockages in the "Pick Tubes", wore out feeling at the end of the day, Passing blood, and some kidney issues). Consultation with the Doctors insist I must stay on the antibiotic for another week in order to completely eliminate the infection. The side effects are minimal in their opinion considering the work the antibiotic is doing. At this point, I would have to think surgery may have been a better option and much cheaper than daily infusions at the hospital.

Although a bit in a griping mode ( actually more than a bit), I am still thankful for the results now considering what might have been the diagnostics that the Doctors first though it was ( Cancer of the Liver).

Every day I go to the infusion center for my injection and I see others there with more severe life threatening diseases getting their injections. Some are diagnose with cancer, others blood disorders, and some with lung or other diseases. Actually I have no room to gripe with my minor side effects but I do thinking I may be worse than they are letting on. Paranoia setting in I think. Wonder if hallucinations are a side effect from the antibiotics?

Each day I am there I look at the others there wondering if they have a relationship with God. I don't go around preaching to the other patients but do try to have a conversation and let my faith pop up in the conversation should they have a need. Some are definitely terminal and I pray for their salvation.

One of the nurses knows of my faith and has come around asking more about God so we do have a good converstaion frequently when time allows and others can over hear what we are talking about. Perhaps other will open up to accept God too as time goes by.

Perhaps this is where God has led me for my new challenge in reaching out to others in need. Only time will tell.

More to follow in part 3.

Saturday, July 30, 2011


I realized some thing is different the weekend of July 16th. I was a little tired and naturally hot due to the weather so I stayed in and kept cool despite feeling a bit off balance and having constant sweats. I just figured I just had a little heat exhaustion and drank plenty of liquids. Nothing seemed to help. By Monday the 18th I was still feeling bad and called in sick. By that afternoon, I was getting worse and started to have high temperatures ( 104 degrees). The wife called the EMS staff and I was transported to the Hospital E.R. All the vitals were in various arrays of concern to the Doctors. After a lengthy stay with every test they could think of plus re hydrating liquids, I was released with a prognosis of a viral infection and anti biotics. That was a relief or so I thought. Two days later I was not any better and back I went to the E.R. This time they kept me for two days and ran further test and MRI scans.

This is when they discovered numerous spots on my Liver which appeared to be possibly cancer. as the Doctor read the scans. There was some solemn moments after getting this news. I was scheduled to go back into the hospital for biopsy test in two days with the MRI machine directing the needles into the liver spots. I was told that 97% of the time when spots appear on the Liver, that is a cause of cancer spreading from another vital organ in the body to the liver. It could additionally mean Colon cancer, Prostate, or Pancreatic cancer. The wife alerted all that she could contact to pray for me in the upcoming test and I also began to pray. I usually don't pray for my self because I felt it was selfish and God had plenty of other issues to deal with but this time was different. I was terrified.

. As I prayed I felt there was not the usual connection that I do have in prayer or I had forgotten how to pray. Perhaps God was busy. This went on for two days and during the wait after the biopsy test. To say I was sure the prognosis was going to be devastating was an understatement. Still I held out faith God would intervene. It was during this time I changed my prayers from "Please God heal me" to "Dear God please allow me the strength and courage to accept what ever the prognosis will be and allow me comfort, wisdom, and faith in your grace". I think it was during those prayers that I did feel a connection was made and an inner peace began to surface. I also began to feel an inner peace that God was now in control. I was ready to accept what ever His plans were. Every thing was in His hands.

I got a call from the Doctor Friday afternoon on the 29th with the results. He went on to state that I was one of the fortunate 3% of the people that had spots on their liver that were not cancerous but a bacterial infection. He also stated the reason that I wasn't getting better was that the earlier antibiotics was not designed to clear up this type of infection. Those were designed for viral infections. I was immediately put on a bacterial antibiotic and the Dr. made an appointment for me to see a contagious disease specialist to see where this infection came from and to clear it out of my Liver. Although I am not out of the woods yet, the Doctor stated if I follow the procedures from the specialist to clear up the infection, I will be back in good physical shape in a short time.

After I hung up from the Doctor's call I felt a huge burden was lifted and elation swepted over me with joy and the tears began to flow like a river as I praised God and thanked Him over and over again for sparing me the alternative prognosis. During this this time of praise, I felt a closeness that I had not felt for awhile come back and envelope me There was no longer any fear but peace. A peace that I cannot describe but felt it was from God. I also felt a new resurgence to begin serving God in a new direction but do not know yet in which direction. I am sure He will let me know in due time.

All I know know is that God intervened in my health crisis, prevented me from facing cancer, and gave me faith that He still is in loving, forgiving, control despite being a sinner of the flesh. All can experience His loving grace if only they will accept Him through faith and love. I look forward with Faith that God will guide me through the upcomming ordeal with the contagious disease specialist. Part two to follow.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011


Have you ever wondered why there has not been any more gospels found or written since the bible was canonized about 300 A.D.? Ok, We have the Gnostic gospels but are they truly from God? Did God just give up on His people and turn His back on them feeling they were a lost cause? Does God still hold out hope for the current people ( Gentiles) as the last vestige of believers and worshipers wishing to celebrate His glory in His kingdom?

All through biblical times and up to Paul God spoke to the select Prophets advising them to address His chosen people to turn away from their rebellion and worshiping pagan idols. It seems all through biblical times God had to repeatedly chastise His chosen people through death, slavery, exile, and allowing other nations to conquer what is now Israel due to not following His words and truths. Jesus even rebuked the Pharisees for their acts of the law with out having true hearts and hearing His words. I believe Jesus even called them Hypocrites. For they did not believe that God sent Jesus as the saviour or messiah.

I have to wonder where are all the prophets of the modern era? I know that the Bible states we cannot add any thing else to the bible but was that written by mortal men and Priest during that time. Was it God inspired as far as that respect? I don't think that He just stopped communicating to the ones that want to hear out His words. I truly think He speaks to us daily to guide us but we fail to hear His thoughts. Some remembering the last passages in Revelations fail to speak out with God inspired messages or prophesies due to that fact.

Remembering Independence Day recently brought me back to old history lessons about our fore fathers that helped build up a nation with God as a focal point for all to worship freely in a religion of their choice and as a nation of free people with representation. I would have to imagine this country was built with God fearing people that laid down their lives for an ideology that proposed freedom, high morals, and high ethics along with faith in a God. If you think about it, those laws were formulated based on the Ten Commandments. I feel this new country had God's blessing as the new land of opportunity

However, over the last few decades things in this country have taken a turn for the worse. There is now legislation to take God out of the pledge of allegiance and to remove God from public forms. The Ten Commandments have been stricken from the court houses. If people use God in any form of speeches, they face prosecution. It is only a matter of time before the churches will not be allowed to worship God in any form or profess their faith. And yet people do not speak up as their rights are slowly stricken down. Just as in biblical times, we see idolarity and worship of material things becomming more prevalent

I am sure God is quite displeased with these actions and again His wrath will become evident. Is America becoming the new Babylon as one sect proposes in their writings? The similarities are hard to ignore. I would have to imagine we are to be tested in the end times to see where our loyalties are.

Do we seek out the Lord to worship Him and spread the gospel to others not yet saved? Do we show love to others not as well off as we are? Do we earnestly seek out ways to serve Him and bring ones seeking salvation to his Kingdom?

Do we get so engrossed in our selves and become self serving? Do we worship material things and all that money can buy. Do we seek out lustful things and ignore others? Do we sin with out remorse? Do we rebel against what God stands for?

You see, God gives us a choice. It is all up to you where you want to be.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011


How do I envision God? How do you envision God? Ok we all have grown up seeing pictures painted and drawn of God in a beard floating in clouds surrounded by small children as angels with that mighty finger pointing down on earth passing judgement ( the one that sticks in my mind).

But is that the real image of God or what man thinks God to look like? With the exception of a few prophets and Moses, No one has actually seen God in all His glory. The other question is why is that? He is a living organism far greater than we can imagine but yet He does not readily make Himself visible to all just yet. That day is comming soon I suspect.

If we have read scriptures there are instances of him creating a nation from bones scattered in a waste land and breathed ( Rhema?) life into them to live as humans. We have read where He destroyed Sodom and Gomorah with fire and brimstone falling from the skies. We have read of Him creating a safe passage ( parting of the sea) for Moses and the Jews to escape Egyptian soldiers chasing them. We have read of Him taking a prophet up into the heavens to show the prophet a view of Earth and that it was round ( like an orb) long before people discovered that the earth was in fact round. God can heal and bring back to life the dead as noted many times in scriptures. We have read of Him visiting a prophet with a vessel that certaily sounds like a space craft with eyes and wings as the prophet describes it. Of course we have Genesis where He creates man and woman in His likeness along with the Garden of Eden.

I just briefly described some of the descriptions found in the scriptures of God and his modes of transportation but I think it makes a point that God is far more technologically advanced than we care to imagine based on a scientific level. So how can we envision Him as the painters envisioned Him centuries ago based on European races?

I think we have our vision of God all wrong. He is far more than that. Translucent yes, Just as Jesus was after His baptism by John the Baptist but more that that for lack of better words. Actually, we have yet to experience His true appearance but I am confident what we will see is beyond our comprehension. Even rationalizing it with science and technology, we will fail to grasp His true appearance.

We all know of His loving grace as it is written in the Scriptures but as it is also said we as His children has felt His wrath for our rebellion against Him through the ages too. Yet still He is a loving, forgiving, and patient God who wishes for all His children to turn their lives over to Him to exprience His grace in His kigdom He has prepared for us .

So what is my vision of God?

A diety that is capable of just thinking and something happens or is created, a God that loves and lives eternally, a God that communicates to His children (us) daily, a God that expresses sorrow and anger but is slow to act in anger, a God that is patient, a God that sacrificed His own son and yet raised him from the dead in order for our sins to be forgiven, a God that walks with us daily even though we don't realize it, and a God that created us in His likeness.

This is a God that gives us a choice to accept Him or reject Him. It is our choice of our own free will.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011


Most people as they grow older do have a reduced hearing ability just as your eyesight fades as one ages. It is just one of the facts of life one has to deal with. In my case, I started off with a hearing loss at a young age after a bout of German Measles as I was told. I lost 90% of my hearing in one ear but the other ear was not affected. Over the years I was able to hide that fact I suppose by always attending school class and insisting I be placed in the front rows in classes claiming I wanted to be able to pay attention better. Most teachers bought it and I was able to keep my little secret a secret for many years. Even my wife in our courting years did not even realize it. I became quite adept at offsetting my hearing problem by manipulation and deceit.

I was always keenly interested in the military as a career when I graduated from school based on my military family heritage. Part of the family was Navy and the other part was Army. I compromised by joining the Air Force. Figured I wouldn't offend any of the family in that respect. So off the flight school I went after graduation. This was the first shocker in my life when I didn't pass the physical. Seems I was in the group where part of the physical was a detailed comprehensive hearing test. Passed all the other test with flying colors but flunked the hearing one because of the one ear with a severe loss..

The dreams of flying went down the tubes and the dejection was very difficult to take. Then is when I realized I was actually deaf in one ear. This was a total destruction of my carefully laid out plans in my career life. I had no clue what I was going to do now. I didn't have a back up plan so I had to come up with something for a new career direction.

After wandering around in meaningless jobs for a year or two, I was led by a strong urging from I did not know by who ( God) at the time to stop at a retailing store that had a job fair. Well it wasn't a strong urging; it was more like my car was guided into that parking lot and I was ushered into the interview. I presented my diplomas, resume, and credentials to a recruiter who was the regional vice president of personnel for this large retail chain. Although my background and experience was mostly technical, I was hired on the spot for their management training program. I stayed with this company and progressed up the ladder quickly till I took a self financed retirement and started my own racing venture financed by this company's excellent stock option plan.

At the time, little did I know being around cars with loud exhaust would play a pivotal part is effecting my other ear. I had noticed at the time that a famous Indy car driver had been wearing hearing aids due to deafness (I thought he had a similar problem growing up) but I didn't think it would bother me as I was so good at off setting not being able to hear in one ear. Well over the years I do think now that may have been the catalyst to experience hearing loss in the other ear too. Ear plugs weren't invented yet for racing. However after a near fatal 185MPH crash in the third year of racing, I decided it was time to hang up the helmet and racing venture. It was by the grace of God that I was spared any critical injuries or death.

Over the last 23 years that I know of, God has come into my life many times but at first, I didn't listen or comprehend His guidance. It wasn't until the last few years that I opened my heart to God did I fully understand He was the one guiding me for His purpose. Looking back in my life, He was always there waiting for me to accept Him and His grace unconditionally.

So slowly the loss of hearing began to creep into the good ear unnoticed by me but others did see the change. I prayed to God for a healing miracle but none came. I prayed again over the last two years but the damage was done. I prayed again but this time all I got was "go to Cincinnati Eye Institute, see James". Now that didn't make sense to me but I followed the voice. They do have a section of their practice for hearing loss and yes there is a James that is the head of the practice.

I went to see this James and got the preliminary test which he suggested I see an ear specialist to confirm that a hearing aid would help the hearing I lost. It seemed to be in the mid ranges where the speech frequencies are mostly located. That made sense as that was where I usually boosted the output on my stereo system equalizer. I wasn't too hot on the idea of a hearing aid based in hearing of other's experiences over the years but I went along with his suggestions, got the results, and was led back to him for a fitting. Still quite sceptical of the miracles of the new age hearing aids claims, I went along just to see if there was any improvements over the last 20 years.

Yes there was quite a difference as I learned with the demonstration that James performed. First I was hooked up to a behind the ear hearing aid which was connected through a computer program where he ran a screen that showed the frequencies in Hertz measurements (16 to be exact) and super imposed my test results in the frequencies where the loss was evident. From that screen, He boosted the mid range frequencies up in the hearing aid to be flat over all frequencies equally and at a proper level. Then we tested for a hearing volume level that I felt comfortable with. A little more tweaking of the hearing aid from the Computer and it opened up a new experience in sound. I did not realize what sounds I was missing before. James printed out a few instructional sheets for me to read and the sound from the printer startled me. The next biggie was the phone use to check for squeals when one puts their ear to the phone head set. Amazingly there was none at all.

Another test was the voice recognition with background noise. Amazingly, I was able to discern all the spoken words even in a noisy environment as the hearing aid digitally focused on the spoken words and reduced the background noise. James even went on to discuss the learning curve I would experience as I began to learn how to hear all over again. He went into the problems I would experience as my brain became adjusted to the new ranges of hearing. All this time I thought I heard with my ears. It is your brain that hears the sounds and adjust for what you are hearing ( deciphering the sounds). If you can't understand the sound, your brain will more than likely ignore it as indistinguishable.

In our conversation before inserting the hearing aid, James seemed to have a deep bass voice. With the hearing aid on, his voice was not as deep a bass voice as I thought. He actually had a good bit of higher mid range nuances in his voice that made his speech easier to understand. I had been missing a lot of sound and didn't even know it. After about an hour of discussions and instructions along with several self help pamphlets and instructions he asked the question to close the sale ( been there done that many times my self in sales). " When do you think you might want to get a hearing aid?" was his question. My answer was " right after you put it in my ear James. It is a perfect fit sound wise".We settled on price, got all the instructions about care of the hearing aid, packets, case, warranties, free batteries, and the receipt. Walked out of the office hearing things I had been missing for the last couple years. I thanked God for leading me to this man and the Cincinnati Eye Institute. In a way, God did heal me of my hearing problem. I am grateful for what he did by leading me there.

I go back in 4 weeks for another fine tune but right now it seems perfect. However, there is a down side. I hear things I never heard before. Some sounds startled me until I became accustomed to what the sounds were. Here again is where your brain has to get accustomed to what it is hearing. Another problem you will note is people seem to be talking louder that they were before. That is great, you are hearing better and understanding what they are saying. The hearing aid is doing what it is supposed to do. Live with it and enjoy it.

If you think or others tell you that you have a hearing loss, believe it and get you hearing checked. Don't wait for a few years like I did and think you don't need one. If you are constantly asking for others to repeat their selves or you say huh, please, or I didn't understand what you said, you need to get your ears checked. If you answer a question with a yes or no and didn't understand what one said to you, get your hearing checked. There is no need to let your hearing loss rule your life or keep you from enjoying what God put in front of you.

The technology of today for hearing loss is much more advanced than even what it was only 5 years ago. You don't have to suffer in silence. If the hearing loss cannot be cured by surgery as in my case, the hearing aid is a viable alternative for a more enjoyable life. And no you do not need a large bubble sticking out of you ears or a mega phone. Most today are completely not visible to the average person. If you have hang ups about wearing one that is visible, there is a large selection of aids that are hidden either behind the ear or inside the ear. It is your choice. Do you want to fake it or hear clearly? I can clearly hear now.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011



We sometimes put our confidence in things like our own skills, jobs, bank accounts, and other material things and over look where our confidence should be put. If one fails to put their faith in God over all else, one is doomed.

I have been thinking a lot lately on issues. One of the pitfalls to that is a headache. Best to leave those issues in God's hands.

Religious Theologians all have the absolute answers as fact. Now that depends on which one you agree with. It is best to believe in what God says, not man.

The greatest danger is not that we renounce our faith, but settle for a mediocre version of it( John Ortberg).

What if a person (man) declared himself as a god and stated there is no absolute truth but that which you make as truth? That there is no heaven or hell? That man determines what is moral or imoral? I think most believers can answer those questions. I would be interested in the answers.

Spiritual Gifts are real and they exist today for those that seek them in earnest through God's grace by the Holy Spirit. Oh how I yearn for them but I fear I am not worthy of such an honor.

Praying to God daily can mean many things. actual prayer, thoughts, giving thanks, thinking, of Him, singing praises, hearing His voice, and yes simply talking to God.

That is all for now.

Sunday, June 5, 2011


Life cycle of a Fuchsia bloom

In Revelations I read about Babylon that was once a city of great importance which represented all that was evil and her destruction that followed. Today Babylon ( in Iraq) still lay in ruins. Does this mean that this city will once again rise to prominence only to be destroyed again. One cult sect now hints the USA is the new Babylon.

Why does God allow evil? We don't know why. I think Billy Graham summed it up best in his book "Answers to life's problems". God did not create evil nor is he the cause. We should not blame Him. Man created evil in defiance to God.

There is a clarity to our vision when we completely forget ourselves and concentrate solely on the task before us in serving God.

Hearing God's voice is so difficult for many. It is only when we learn to listen for that still silent voice do we make the connection.

In this hurry up, at once results society, we need solitude. A time to reflect and do nothing, a time to invite Jesus into your solitude, and hear His voice.

Spiritual gifts are not for only the most holy but for all that desire them in edifying God's grace. However, if one uses them to glorify oneself, one is not doing a service to God but glorifying their selves. There is a name for those that do.

Are we grateful for Jesus miracles when they happen today? Do we stop and take a moment out of our busy schedule and say a prayer praising Jesus for His miracles in our lives. I read in the scriptures where Jesus healed 10 Lepers and only one came forward to give thanks. The one that did was a foreigner, the others failed to give Him thanks as Jesus noted to the apostles.

More to follow.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011


A fitting picture for this time of the year.

When I go to church I like to sit up in the first couple rows so I can hear the message clearly because of some hearing loss. When I get there, they are either saved or reserved for people in groups with perfectly good hearing. You ask for a place that has provisions for the hearing impaired and you are directed to the balcony in the back of the church where there are no provisions. Why is that?

I often read that one should be spiritually mature in their faith. But yet God calls us his children.

I suspect spiritual maturity means one that loves what God loves and hates what He hates, Has a relationship with God, and hears His voice. No need for one to have a doctorate in religious theology or has memorized the bible.

I once met a person that professed to be a good Christian. He was judgemental, acted like every one else was a sinner and going to hell, very unfriendly, loved no one, and drank like a fish.

I also met a person as a door greeter in one church. He was charming, easily accessible and remembered your name even after the service. Even went so far as to introduce people to others in the church when he found out they were new to the church.

In a broken, fallen world, we only have two choices: mature friendship with God , or radical disillusionment. Friendship with God frees us from being limited by what we don't have, by what we are suffering, or by what we are enduring. I would have to think this friendship is worth more than any thing this fallen world can offer despite how richly it appears at first glance.

People with messy spirituality. I would have to think that describes most of us if we would be honest with our selves. It is a place where desperation meets Jesus. It is the delirious consequence of a life ruined by Jesus who will love us right into His arms despite our sins, failings, and messy lifestyle if we only would accept Him into our lives.

I would have to believe in the beginning that God knew that our short comings would condemn us as sinners. Thus he brought forth Jesus as a sacrifice for our sins past, present, and the future. But as Jesus healed the blind man, He told him to sin no more or something worse would happen. I would have to think if we are saved, we can't still go around sinning in the old life style thinking we are automatically saved.

I was once a skeptic of the spiritual gifts and was taught the gifts were only active during the time of the Apostles. They do not exist any more. But I read in Paul's writing that they are active until the return of Jesus. So who do we believe? Scriptures or the religions that deny their existence any more. I have had experiences to the contrary. I believe they do still exist in these times. Although I do not possess any gifts, I am amazed of ones that do have spiritual gifts that edify God.

A few thoughts that have passed my mind. More to come later.

Saturday, April 23, 2011


As we approach Easter Sunday, non believers probably wonder what is all the fuss about

After all wasn't Jesus only a mortal man that was crucified for His different stand against conventional thinking of the Pharisees and their hardened hearts? He brought forth a new way to worship God. He even made new laws of the faith. In the eyes of the Pharisees, this was heresy and it meant death to any one that differed from their legalistic views. The only way to end this rebellion was to bring Jesus to trial and insure that it would end His rebellious concept of faith. And to top it off, they even enlisted the help of Pilate( a Roman Governor) of Jerusalem at the time who reluctantly went along with their plan. After all no one can come back from the dead as the Pharisees thought.

However, The Pharisees unwittingly fulfilled what was in the prophesies form the Prophets in the old testament.. Had they knew more about the old testament prophesies, they might have taken a different view of who Jesus really was but they were blind and could not see because of hardened hearts and jealousy.

Jesus ( the Son of God) died that Friday on the cross not because of the Pharisees but to forgive us of our sins as the ultimate sacrifice knowing full well that he would rise again and be at the side of God as our intercessor. The curtain in the temple was ripped apart, there was a rumbling of the earth,The angels in heaven were silent, and God spoke not. Jesus was laid to rest in a borrowed tomb and the boulder was rolled against the opening with Roman soldiers standing guard.

That fateful morning His followers came to the tomb to cleanse Jesus' body with spices but the tomb was open and the guards were gone. Jesus' body was also missing from the tomb. At the tomb stood two men in shining garments and asked the followers why seek the living among the dead? He is not here but has risen. Remember what He said while in Galilee. Mary Magdalene, Joanna, and Mary the mother of Jesus was also among the followers. They rushed to tell the apostles of what they had witnessed.

Jesus had indeed risen from the grave and lived again. In fact Jesus appeared to the disciples and His followers numerous times as well as bestowing the Holy Spirit on them to start their Christian ministry as witnesses not only to His Ascension but to His words of truth.

So lets look at the ramifications of this event. With the exception of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead after 3 days, I don't recall of any one in this day and time with our high tech science being able to do that super natural type of event. Yes this event was super natural, super powerful, God inspired, and hard for many to comprehend even to this day. Yet there were witnesses to this event. People that were commissioned by Jesus in person after his death on the cross to go forth to spread the gospel to the multitudes.How greater is it to have faith and believe in this event and with what was promised for the future.

That one action with Jesus rising from the grave and lived again set forth a movement that encircled the globe from a humble beginning to become what is called Christianity today so that ones seeking God and His loving grace can find it through Jesus Christ.

In Scriptures, there are 1000 prophesies. Over 600 have already been filled and we are heading into the times that more will be filled. Can you take heart that His words are truth and the way to everlasting life in Heaven as a follower of Jesus Christ?

I pray that all can take a moment to reflect on what happened in those times that changed the world and our future. Praise God and Happy Easter.

Friday, April 8, 2011


Why me? During my wanderings this evening, I was urged to pull into the Walmart shopping center and noticed a lady in her 40s looking rather weak and devastated holding the typical sign that says "Please help me. I am homeless and need food money". Any thing will help.

Then I heard a voice that said to pull over and park. The wife looked at me rather puzzled but she also spotted the lady. We watched her for a minute or two then the wife said we need to help her. I agreed. I got out of my car and walked up to her and startled her. The wife was behind me and the wife said the Lord will take care of you. Don't be afraid. Then the voice ( God) said to me to give her ten times what she has in her pocket. I asked her if she was getting much help and she replied not much and she said she had only $4.00 tightly clutching it and showing the money to me. That wasn't enough to put gas in her car and pointed over to an old Chevy Cavalier that had seen better days.

I then said that I am sure the Lord told me to give you ten times what you have in money now. She looked at me in amazement as I pulled out the money and put it in her hands. With this offer she began to fall to her knees crying and thanked me but I said to thank God as he is looking out for you and loves you. We normally do not pay attention to people standing on street corners begging for money but you were different. The Lord intervened for you. She said through her tears thank God my prayers were answered. She went on to say that she was praying for the amount I gave her so she could get gas for the car and food for a few days.

We found out she has been living out of her car since she lost her apartment last month and this was going to allow her to get gas and buy food as she hasn't eaten the last two days. We also gave her a card for a local church that has a food pantry and may be able to find shelter for her too. As we were walking away she asked how can she repay us which was a surprise? I said you just did. Keep the faith in God and go the that church pantry. They can help physically and spiritually too. As we drove a way the disparity in her face appeared to be fading as she waved at us . We prayed that she can get help and find solace

This is a sample of how much of a push over I am for those that truly appear to be needy. My heart goes out to them. I only wished I could do more for them, but my finances are strapped just like every one else but if the Lord say give, I follow His guidance.

Why is it that we are the richest nation on earth and our own people are on the streets begging for hand outs due to hardships. Our own government dishes out billions of dollars each year in hand outs to other countries. Why not take care of our own first? Why aren't the churches reaching out to those that are like this lady that has an honest hardship instead of waiting for them to come in for help. To be effective in this type of ministry, I would imagine we need to wander out side of the church to see where they are and show our love for the down trodden and help them back up onto their feet.

Yep. I am a patsy for those that are less fortunate. My heart goes out to them.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011



In a prior post I mentioned about my spirituality which labeled me as a messy follower who thought out of the box probably too much and really didn't fit in well with a conventional church. Well that is me. One messy follower of Christ, non pretentious, and seeking God. My ideology doesn't fit the mainstream church doctrine but I believe it does follow what Jesus was trying to say to His followers in the scriptures. OK, maybe I did put in a few beliefs of my own too. Hey ! I am not perfect in any stretch of the imagination but I have the desire to follow Christ despite my sinful nature. Thank God, He is a forgiving, loving, and graceful Jesus.

As you know Jesus mixed up things in His teachings and miracles that set the Pharisees into a tither and openly brought out their faults. What kind of religious teacher was he that kept friends from the unsavory crowd and made them disciples? Even an adulteress, a tax collector, and a thief were some of his followers. Quite a messy crowd don't you think?

In my wanderings through the desert I did run across a book by Mike Yaconelli on Messy Spirituality. The title did give me hope that I was not alone in my journey. Here is an excerpt from his book:

Messy spirituality is a description of the Christianity most of us live and that few of us admit. It is an attempt to break through the religious wall of secrecy and legitimize a faith which is unfinished, incomplete, and inexperienced. Messy spirituality is a celebration of a discipleship which is under construction.

Messy spirituality is the scandalous assertion that following Christ is any thing but tidy and neat, balanced and orderly. Far from it. Spirituality is complex, complicated, and perplexing- the disorderly, sloppy, chaotic look of authentic faith in the real world.

Spirituality is anything but a straight line; it is a mixed up, topsy turvey, helter skelter Godliness that turn our lives into an upside down toboggan ride full of unexpected turns, surprise bumps, and bone shattering crashes. In other words,messy spirituality is the delirious consequence of a life ruined by a Jesus who will love us right into His arms.

Christianity is not for people who think religion is a pleasant distraction, a nice alternative, or a positive influence. Messy Spirituality is a good term for the place where desperation meets Jesus. More often than not in Jesus' day, desperate people who tried to get to Jesus were surrounded by religious people who either ignored or rejected those who were seeking to have their hunger for God filled. Sadly, not much has changed over the years.

Desperate people don't do well in churches. They don't fit, and they don't cooperate in the furthering of their starvation ( yes I meant starvation). Church people often label desperate people as strange and unbalanced. When desperate people get a taste of God, they can't stay away from Him, no matter what everyone around them thinks.

The New Testament is filled with desperate people who barged into private dinners, screamed at Jesus until they had his attention or destroyed a roof of someones house to get to him. People who are desperate for spirituality very seldom worry about the mess they make on their way to be with Jesus.

In a way I guess this describes me to a point. Always reading and relishing in the words found in scripture and having a hunger for Jesus. It is interesting to note every time I read a section of the bible, I come up with a deeper meaning of what is being said. Some times it is just a soft reassurance and other times it jumps out of the pages at me. Other times as I am praying or thinking about Jesus, ( which is also prayer) I get a revelation. One time it was a soft spoken voice saying " bring the church to them" . It was a time in the desert when I was contemplating what I was supposed to be doing in serving God. Thus began my ministry in serving those that never set foot in a church. I had written about this in prior blogs.

Mike Yaconelli did give me a better understanding of what it meant to be a messy follower in Christ and that I was not entirely alone. Now I just have to work on thinking out side of the box to be sure it is spiritually led. Some times I think it is and other times I am not sure. When in doubt, I try to follow the scriptures or ask for understanding.

Yes indeed. I am a messy follower that is only a sinner forgiven in Jeus name.

Sunday, March 13, 2011


Another photo I have found depicting a winged lion with the head of an eagle.

As I read the bible, there are descriptions of animals or things that come to mind as being mythical. Such as the case in Ezekiel describing a craft that came down from the heavens to land in front of him. In a sense it could be described as a space craft or helicopter based on modern technology. In other parts of the bible there was a description of a lion body with the head of an eagle and with wings I would have to suppose that in biblical times the prophets could only discern what they were seeing in animal terms.

However, I would have to think that in fact these descriptions were parables to a greater meaning or purpose. Such as in Revelations describing Babylon as a harlot and the sea monster with ten horns that rose out of the sea representing possibly ten nations or tribes.

<> The one thing that has always puzzled me is the depictions of biblical people such as Jesus, the disciples, prophets, and the people of that time in pictures and paintings to have a European look about them. I don't suppose that they actually looked like Europeans but actually looked more of a Middle Eastern decent in my mind. Perhaps most of the art work was painted by Europeans in those times as Christianity grew into other regions. I would have to think when Jesus was blessed by the Holy Spirit and began His ministry, His transfiguration is possibly what we will actually see Him as He actually is in the second coming. I will also have to think we will look different too if we are chosen. This has always puzzled me and I don't have a answer. Perhaps some day we will all know.

I do believe that with in a short time we will have our eyes opened to the wonders and miracles of the Holy Kingdom. The heavens are already opening up to us revealing the vastness of the cosmos and it's order. Many miracles and signs will be shown to us in preparation on Jesus' second coming. As Jesus said " be repaired and be ready. I will come like a thief in the night. No one but the Father knows when that time will be."

I have read where many people in various countries that never knew Jesus are being saved through missionary and revival work in preparation of His second coming. What an honor to be a part of a missionary group that leads others to Christ in distant lands and near home.

Are you ready? Are you working with others to bring them to Jesus as their saviour? Are you following God's will to save others seeking Him?

Saturday, March 12, 2011



Last night was finally a moderate night and I took the opportunity to just sit outside and gaze at the stars which brought up a passage from the bible I recalled about the signs from the heavens. I scanned the night time skies and didn't see any thing out of order.

However, it did bring back memories of dreams I have occasionally where I am looking up at the heavens and noted unusual activity. In this dream I am seeing what looks like stars dancing across the night time sky in no set pattern. I don't feel fear but joy. It is as if I am told not to fear these lights but to rejoice for it is now time for the prophesy to be fulfilled. That is as far as I get with the dream.

I lately have learned that some time in 2012 there will be a possible super nova explosion in the heavens that will appear as if we will have two suns for a short time. Kind of like when the birth of Jesus happened and the wise men and shepherds were led to His birth place by a star. When and where it will happen I have no idea. Can't find where I read this.

I have watched the recent devastation in Japan with interest and horror which brought up recalling prophesy about destruction in the end times. The earth will shake and tremble, seas will over flow their banks and engulf the land, and fire will fall from the skies. If you think about the disasters that have happened in the last few years around the world, it might point to the beginning of the prophesy recorded in the bible. Then you have the civil unrest in the middle east area. You add all this up and what can one surmise these events mean?

Part two to follow

Saturday, February 26, 2011


A few years ago we grew tired of the 4 local channels we were able to get for free in our town. We decided to check out the new Satellite TV offers being advertised every where for only $29.99. You had sports channels of all sorts, science channels, history channels, science fiction channels, and some movie with older releases channels. No more visits to the Block Buster video store. Wow what a deal! Over 225 channels of continuous programming 24/7 with only a few commercials. Hey they even offered premium channels for only $4.99 extra with out any commercials ( movie channels with the latest movies fresh out of Hollywood.) They even offered several Christian program channels that hawked sending in donations to keep their ministry on the air. We even had Jimmy and Tammy Faye Baker programming. This was hog heaven and we bought it.

Over the years the Satellite TV service even added more channels as well as offering your own local channels on satellite TV for only $10.00 more. That was a deal to pay for local channels that were free on rabbit ears before. Naturally we bought that deal. It was worth it? More Movie channels were added but that was OK even at $11.00 a channel. Now comes the HD TV programming and we bought a new HD TV to go with the new HD receiver that was only $15.00 a month more for the HD service. Yep. We were set now. It don't get any better that this.

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So now we were up to $150.00 a month for satellite TV service and more channels than we can watch in a life time. Hey they now even got Playboy channels too but that cost a little extra if you are into that. The premium movie channels now play movies that I never heard of and still tout them a the latest releases from Hollywood. Which Hollywood are the referring too? Now we have also pay per view channels which runs from $5.00 to $60.00 if you want to watch Wrestle mania live and some sports events. That is Ok though. We even got channels that now try to sell you goods 24/7 at inflated prices ( HSN, QVC, and the MSNBC channel) No commercials there though.

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Of course all this programming cost money to operate so the satellite company sells out commercial time to companies to hawk their products like Viatalia enhancer for a better libido, Lightening 4 G network, Shellack oil to make your car run smoother. That is fine. I can understand the need to keep the company profitable. Usually if a commercial in on one channel I will flip over to another program to watch while the commercial is on the previous channel. The satellite company must be able to monitor what you watch. Doing what I mentioned above must be a sin now in their eyes. If I am on one channel and a commercial comes on when I now switch, I will find another channel with the same commercial on at the same time. Flip to another channel and you have commercials. I wonder how they do that?

OK I am still understanding the company needs money to stay profitable. That is cool. Now I am noticing the programs that can be shown in 30 minutes takes an hour to show due to the company trying to make money in order to present their programs. Uh Wait a minute! I am being deluged with 30 minutes of mindless commercials all at the same time for a 30 minute program that takes 1 hour to show. Now I am forgetting what I am watching due to all the commercials.

Let me get this straight. I am paying $150.00 a month for programming 24/7 that half that time are only commercials .Something is not adding up here. The satellite company also is now showing the same programs over and over again for weeks at a time. We have lost the freshness of new topics coming on weekly. But don't forget next week Wrestle Mania comes on pay per view with the Royal Rumble No Holds Bared Match. Only $75.00 for a limited time.

Oh well, there is always books and magazines to read once you tear out all the commercial tabs stuck in them. Another option is the Holy Bible. You can find historical facts, military actions, faith healing, Stories of miraculous happenings, songs, words of great prophets, and the actual words of Jesus our saviour among other interesting happenings. Did I mention there are no commercials?

Monday, January 17, 2011



If you have followed my prior post you will notice I seem to be wandering around in a proverbial desert trying to figure out where my direction in faith is leading me and actually where I fit in. So far I have experienced people seeking out God and Christ for answers, praying for a healing, and seeking salvation. I think if I would only listen more for His words, things might be a little easier but then again, that would be too easy for this sinful flesh.

I think we all make things too complicated in dealing with hearing God when all we have to do is listen for His words. Now that takes time and has a learning curve in it. There in lies the catch. It is a learning curve. First we must do as the father does. Love and show compassion for others. Be forgiving to those that have hurt you ( now that is a tough one for some) and carry not any grudges. No one is perfect ( well except for God and Jesus). A frequent dialog ( prayer) with God In Jesus name does help. At first it may only seem one sided but eventually you will learn to listen and actually hear God's voice speaking to you in a still silent voice.

Usually most will pray to God when they are faced with a major crisis but He also wants to hear from you when you are happy and things are doing great for you. Maybe just a "thank you God" for what you do have would be nice.

There has been a new resurgence of people coming back into the traditional conservative churches due to the uncertainties we now live in but the fact remains there are still millions of others seeking God for the first time. Many were turned off from past experiences and never returned feeling they did not fit in or are considered an outcast.

These are the people that God wants in our churches. Do we welcome them or do we judge them as not a good fit? It is not our place to judge who can experience God's grace. Only God Himself has that right. All we can do is accommodate them and welcome them with open arms in God's house. However, we must help them in their new found faith to grow stronger and prosper. It takes a lot of will power and struggles to get one into a church but it only takes a second to turn them away. What does your church do?

In my own struggles, I have become some what of a maverick and think out side of the box according to conventional thinking but am I really? I have embraced the Spiritual Gifts and healing but I don't think I possess any gifts. I show compassion and love for others but isn't that what God want us to do? I try to encourage others with God's words. Some have said I should start my own church and they would attend. I am not a pastor, nor am I a minister. If I did start a church, I want it to be God's church, not my church. Actually I feel a church is any where two or more gather to worship God. So now it is where ever I am led to minister to others. I don't think He has the idea of me starting a church in mind for me. Leading others to Christ is my commission. Nothing else shows up on the radar.